Kane & Abel May Visit 'The Pen'

Is anyone out there a cocaine dealer and needs people to lie for them during a federal court case? Then, you should really consider giving identical twin rappers Kane & Abel (born Daniel and David Garcia) a call. Their impressive experience in such matters is enough to satisfy any drug kingpin, namely Richard Pena, who the sibling duo has recently utilized their superior lying skills for. While studying at Xavier University, Kaine & Abel met Pena, who later financed their music careers. After the financing ceased, Pena put them to work in his drug ring. Murdering eight people, Pena was then arrested in 1997. Kane & Abel went on to work for Pena further by lying to federal agents regarding Pena's activities. I wonder if this means that Kane & Abel will get a bonus for such a wonderful job they did?

(Only if they are lucky enough!)

Pleading guilty to committing misprision of a felony, a judge may offer the former No Limit recording artists up to three years in a "luxurious" resort, fondly referred to by many vacationing convicts as "the pen." The judge will be graciously offering them this wonderful deal, since the duo has reached an agreement with prosecutors, after they admitted to concealing knowledge of a felony in which they did not participate in. This is already the second time that they have been arraigned in the case, and their sentencing hearing is scheduled for September 12.

If Kane & Abel do get the opportunity to travel to "the pen," I hope that they bring me back something good. The last time a recording artist got sent there, all I got was a lousy T-shirt. And, the postcard they sent me didn't even reach my mailbox until after they got back home!

Unfortunately, the Mountain Brothers won't be able to visit "the pen" anytime soon, because the only "coke" they are willing to deal with comes in beverage form. Managed by music impresario Amelia Moore (formerly General Manager of Ruff Ryders Entertainment), the Asian rap group is way too busy to add "cell mates" to their critically acclaimed recording group status. Following a "Moore" positive itinerary, the Mountain Brothers will be releasing their second LP in the fall, and group member Chops' debut solo LP will follow shortly behind. Chops already has been credited for contributing his production skills to both prominent United States and international recording artists, such as United Kingdom's Grammy-winning folk/trip-hop artist, Beth Orton; Japan's M-Flo; Philadelphia's Bahamadia; and another Philadelphia native, Bigfoot, who is signed to Kurupt's Antra Records. If any recording artists out there are wanting to subscribe a positive itinerary, then you definitely need to seek out Moore.

Or, maybe actress Shannen Doherty, who currently stars in the WB's Charmed, should seek out Moore also. Scheduled to return back to court for sentencing on June 12, Doherty has now pleaded no contest to a DUI charge and refusing to submit to a chemical test during her arrest in December 2000. She originally entered an innocent plea in March. Allegedly weaving across a southern California highway, Doherty was given a field sobriety test at the time of her arrest, and then was "escorted" to jail for a blood test to determine her level of intoxication. Results showed that her blood-alcohol level was 0.13 percent. However, the legal blood-alcohol limit for California drivers is 0.08 percent.

According to Deputy District Attorney Ian Morse, Doherty will either be sentenced to 48 hours in jail or five days in a work-release program, since she is a first-time offender. Doherty could also face additional punishment, due to her failure to submit to a chemical test.

Too bad Doherty can't "charm" her way out this situation.